Can I get an "Amen?"

Hi everyone!

I hope your summers are going well. I miss seeing all of you on a regular basis.

It's weird that in just a month a lot of things have changed, but such is the nature of life. And things will continue to change as we all start getting jobs and start working.  The future holds so many possibilities.  It's exciting, yet daunting. 

I wanted to blog and update you all on what's going on with me.  I have officially been hired and started working at Los Angeles Christian Health Center, specifically the Joshua House clinic where Rachel Dunham works.  The way that I got the charge nurse position is completely a God thing and I wanted to expand a little bit more on that because it is so good.

When I was originally "hired," I was hired for the dispensary position in the clinic, which was a temporary 3 month position.  I was going to take the place of the RN who worked in the dispensary (or pharmacy) as he moved into the charge nurse role.  My job was temporary because should the other nurse decide that the administrative role wasn't for him, he was guaranteed his old position.  So that was the plan. And I was excited about the opportunity to work in the dispensary, even if it was only for a short time.

Little did I know, that while I was waiting to hear from the clinic about when I was going to start, that there were already changes happening.  Apparently, the nurse in the dispensary realized that he wasn't cut out for the charge nurse role and declined the offer after prayerfully considering it.  I had gotten an email during HURST review about changes happening but I had no idea that that was what it meant.  All the while, the director of nursing, who wanted an experienced nurse to take the position was looking for and interviewing other nurses. What all this means is that while I thought I had a secure job at the clinic, I actually didn't! HAHA. Yikes.  During this time of waiting on my end, even though I had no idea what was going on, I felt God telling me that things will work out in the end and that I had nothing to worry about.  I was able to focus on just studying for the NCLEX.  During this time,  I also got a call from UCLA about interviewing for the PICU, which was exciting. I even started to think about what it would be like to work for UCLA, etc.

But, I only did an initial interview with UCLA and after a few phone calls to their HR department, it became apparent that they weren't going to call me for a second interview.  That week, I felt really disappointed and wondered about what was NOT going on. HAH.  The thought of working at the PICU in UCLA sounded really exciting, but I saw in my own heart that I was more excited about saying that I worked there than I was about working in a hospital. I knew it would open up a lot of doors and would look awesome on my resume.  But I also knew that I didn't want to actually work in a hospital and that I eventually wanted to end up in community health or something.  I thought about the Joshua House clinic and remembered why I was excited to work there in the first place, to be able to live out the Gospel in a more intentional way and to be able to love on the urban poor on Skid Row... that's where I really wanted to be. But I still hadn't heard from them.  I had to again trust that God was in the works somehow. I wanted to be open to Him, to let go of my control, my fears and my anxiety and to be open to the direction He was going to move my life. 

That same week, I got a phone call from the DON at the Joshua House clinic.  She told me that she knew that I had been in contact with the director of pharmacy and wanted to see if I was interested in interviewing for the charge nurse position instead.  I was a little dumbfounded.  But she continued, "Linell, God works in mysterious ways.  And your name has been on my mind and has been coming across my desk these last few weeks and I feel like I need to be obedient.  I said that I wanted to hire an experienced RN (to which I replied, "Um, yeah. I don't blame you!) but as I've learned through the years--what I want is often different from what God wants or is planning. Can you come in on Monday at 11am for an interview?"

That was on Wednesday, June 22nd. And I was taking the NCLEX on the 25th and heading up to Santa Barbara for the weekend to forget about it.  What ended up happening that weekend was amazing in that I was able to reflect on all the things that God had been doing in my life over the last five years!  But, just to talk about what happened that weekend would take another blog post or two--and since this is already getting pretty long, I will spare you from all the nitty gritty details :). Basically, the gist of what God revealed to me was:  how He had broken me only to restore me and prepare me for His work and for leadership.  That I now had a clearer identity of who I am in Him and a real assurance of His great love for me and for His people.  And in my brokenness, I can love others in their brokenness and show the same grace that He has shown me--in a very real and honest way.

When Monday rolled around, I walked into the interview not really knowing what was going to happen.  After the DON talked to me about what the position entails and what her vision was for the charge nurse, she asked me how I felt.  I told her that I felt a lot of peace about the situation and that God had done amazing things in my life leading up to this point which felt like would prepare me for such a role and I was compelled share my testimony with her.  At the end of it all, I said that even if I don't get hired, I know that I was supposed to be there, in her office, to share what God has done in my life.  She gave me a hug then a hearty "Amen."  Then she asked me if I ever actually filled out an application for Joshua House and I said no, so she sent me off to fill one out.  She said that she had a few interviews lined up for the position in the afternoon and she was looking to hire someone that same week and thus needed an application from me ASAP.

Admittedly, as I was sitting in an empty room filling out the necessary paper work, I felt nervous.  I knew that it made more sense for her to hire an experienced RN. What new grad nursing student takes a charge nurse position--especially a new grad without any tangible hospital experience?  That's ridiculous!  It wouldn't make any sense!

After I filled out my application, I walked back into her office to give it to her.  She asked me to have a seat and closed the door.  Then she said, "Linell, what I see in you is openness.  And a desire to obey God.  We are first and foremost a ministry and we want people who work here to love God and to love the people we serve.  This is why I want to offer you the charge nurse position here at Joshua House."  I couldn't believe it!  I sat there excited with tears welling up from my eyes.  I noticed that she was crying, too!  We hugged each other and then she said, "Well, this is the first time I've felt peace about this in a while!"  I told her that I felt pretty awesome, too. 

Then she gave me my official start date, which was June 29th.  And I have been training ever since.  I just feel like this job is such a wonderful blessing from God and it's a miracle to me! It also seems like such a perfect fit for the ways that God has made me to be.  Many of the people that I've met at work have told me that they have been praying for me, or at least for whoever was going to fill the charge nurse position, and they are excited for me to join their team.   I feel so blessed and well supported.  I definitely want to give all the glory to God, because of how He has prepared me for this and how He's worked in my heart to lead me to a place of openness.  I am really excited for what He has in store for me in this new role.  I know that it will be hard, so if I ever come across your mind, please pray for me and that I would continue to be obedient and open!

If you've made it this far, thank you for reading!  :) Take heart the truth of God's love and provision, that He does not leave us behind. For He knows exactly where He wants us.     

For we are his workmanship, created in Christ Jesus for good works, which God prepared beforehand that we should walk in them." [Ephesians 2: 10]

Love,
Linell